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Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Fort Knox

My current Multi function printer, scanner, copier etc etc conked out on me and so I have been on the lookout for a new scanner. I found one in SLC for $25. It looked nice and so I arranged to pick it up. So I drive to downtown Salt Lake last night. The seller tells me that he would leave it outside his office door and in return I would slip the money under the door. So I get there and discover the door is locked...Bummer. Fort Knox 1 Aaron 0.

I realize that the door is one that is magnetically charged and in order to get in you have to swipe your card. I decide to call the guy. I put my 50 cents in and dial the number. I get the "if you wish to make a call, please hang up and try again..." routine. So I hang up. And I pull the release coin lever (several times) Fort Knox 2 Aaron 0. Just as I give in to despair I see a gentleman going through the door to Fort Knox. I rush over and knock. He lets me in: Fort Knox 2 Aaron 1. I look at the directory and know that i have to get up to the 4th floor. So I push the elevator button and get in. I select the 4th level button, and nothing happens. It is then that I realize that you also need to swipe your card to go up the elevator. Fort Knox 3 Aaron 1. So I step out and remember seeing the stairs just around the corner. "Great" I think as I head up the stairs. I get to the 2nd floor and realize that the stairs stop there. For some inexplicable reason the stairs at the end 2nd floor. Fort Knox 4 Aaron 1.

So I go back down to the 1st floor and see a woman with a cell phone. I ask if I can borrow her cell phone to call the seller. She hands it over (no it wasn't a holdup) and I explain that I just need to get to the 4th floor. She says she can help me. I relinquish the phone and step into the elevator. She leans in, swipes her card and presses the 4th level button. I thank her and leave her at the first floor. Then I realize that the elevator is not moving. Fort Knox 5 Aaron 1. The doors open and she realized the problem. "I'll just ride up with you." and I agree. So she swipes her card and selects the 4th floor. Nothing happens. I realize that she must only have access to the floor on which she works and below. So she chooses the 3rd floor. Success. Fort Knox 6 Aaron 2. By this point I wonder if the seller realizes how difficult it is for me to get to the scanner. We arrive at the 3rd floor and I wish my new found saviour goodbye. I climb the last stairs to the 4th floor. Just down the hall I see the scanner where the seller tells me it will be. (No wonder he said he would leave it outside his office)

Fort Knox 6 Aaron 3.

Having possession of the scanner I make my way back to the elevator hoping that I won't need the card to get down. I select floor 1 and the elevator quickly deposits me there. Fort Knox 6 Aaron 4.

Later I get the scanner home and discover that it does not work with any of my computers... Fort Knox 7 Aaron 4.

Although this experience was a learning lesson, I did have one thing to smile about: As I ate my dinner at a nearby KFC I noticed a couple apparently deeply in love...ahhh springtime... The couldn't keep their lips off of each other. Then as I was looking out the window I noticed a reflection next to me. The wall had mirrors on it. I looked into the mirror and saw this same couple slow dancing to the jukebox 50s music. Yes, the couple was actually dancing to the music inside of the KFC. Crazy...I still feel bad that the employees had to put up with the affection.

So later we decide to get a reliable scanner. I bought one off of circutcity late last night.

Fort Knox 7 Aaron 5.

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